Sunday, August 29, 2010

WARNING – This post has explicit language. Sorry grandma

I love conversations in the gotfam household. I really do. Between two mostly-sober parents, one toddler, one infant, and two stinky critters…we have a lot to talk about.

Today’s conversation (while in the car):

Carter: Moo-Fa-cell!
Me: What? What did you say buddy?
Chad: Hey Bud, can you take the binky out and say that?
Carter: Fooo-caa o aaa mama
Me (quietly to Chad): Did he just tell me to F- off?
Chad: Umm..well…I don’t think he intended to say that…but it really sounded like that didn’t it?
Me: Carter – what did you say?
Carter: Mo-Ci-cellll mama
Me: OHHH…Motorcycle! That’s right buddy – there is a motorcycle in front of us
Carter: Buh - bye Mutha Fucle
Carter: Buhh Bye Mutha Fuuuka
Chad (in total laughter): WHAT? What did you say?
Me: Carter – Say that again please…
Carter: Buh Bye Mutha Fuuuka
Chad (while frantically trying to get his phone to turn into a video camera): SAY THAT AGAIN!
Me (to Chad): What is the name of that movie about the bachelor party in vegas – the one with the little guy that pops out of the trunk of a car half-clothed yelling “Mutha Fuckas”

And - because I'm that mom ... I taped it when we got home. It was much more clear(ly wrong) in the car. But you'll get the idea here.

Note: If you're wondering why he says "babies" when we take his (sister's pink) binky out of his mouth - it's because we're trying to get rid of that stupid binky. So we told him that binky's are for babies.

Saturday, August 28, 2010

Mommy's Cheese

It's been a long day (most of which was spent in the emergency room with a very sick little boy). More to come on that.
Until this mommy has enough energy to post anything - please enjoy a few pictures from a recent photo shoot (from a wonderful photographer who broke my heart when she announced that she's moving to South Korea)

I realize that some of these are cheesy and staged (because we don't typically hang out on a perfectly fluffed bed in white and black outfits staring at each other lovingly (hell, I rarely even have my hair down (read: I never do my hair)). And Avery doesn't lay on her pink chair with a huge flower hat on - pondering world peace. But, sometimes...I like cheese. A LOT OF CHEESE. Cheese makes me happy.

Thursday, August 26, 2010

His new name:

Carter told me this morning that his name is: Tarter Monkey-Cheese Big Truck. I’d have to assume that it’s like this:

First Name: Tarter
Middle Name: Monkey-Cheese
Last Name: Big Truck

I can hear it now (at his future Nobel Peace Prize award ceremony (do they have ceremonies for that?)):

“…And now, please welcome Tarter Monkey-Cheese Big Truck to the stage to accept this year’s Nobel Peace Prize.”

And I’ll be all “THAT’S MY BOY!”

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

He is officially 2...and we're still alive

Carter actually turned two years old on August 4th (when we were in Michigan). And I tried not to cry for that entire day...and now ... as I realize that he's actually 2. Has time flown by that fast? What can I say - I love my little man.
Well, being the party-happy parents that we are...Chad and I were determined to throw him a party (with or without this house being done). In fact, we were determined to throw him a Thomas the Train party...given that he's so crazy for trains...and most vehicles in general.
I went to 3 different party stores to find enough Thomas the Train supplies, Chad ordered a Thomas the Train Cake (well, he found the baker... I psycho-ed the poor lady with pictures I had found on the internet of perfect cakes - I had to make Uncle Michael and Uncle Trad proud (after their cake last year - I was nervous to try to find anything that would hold up to expectations!))
I think the cake went over pretty well. Carter was excited at least.
Well, he was excited about the entire dessert table... that's my boy. if having friends over to play in the sandtable wasn't enough (it normally would be for Carter - the boy loves his sand) (you'll see him (below) playing with Jilly in the sandbox), he also got a ton of presents - including a new train table (from his mommy and you buddy!), and trampoline (from uncle Andy)... I can't seem to get this video to be bigger...but you'll get the idea about how much he loves loves loves it,

a ton of cars and trucks,

AND - he had a bounce house (that we borrowed) to play in during the party...

AND HORSES that Chad's Aunt and Uncle brought for the kids (ok ok...and adults) to ride!

Above is Chad and Carter on Bill (the horse), and Carter's buddy Bradley and I on John horse.
Below are a few more horse picturs (because it was so freaking's worth a ton of photos)

And...since no party is successful without a ton of setup and assembly of kids toys ... I have to throw this in - Thanks dad and Chad ... I knew that if I supplied enough beer - you two would get the job done.
What the heck do we do for a 3rd birthday? The bar has been set high.

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

A Mom Blogger on Target

Dear Target,

I have been a life long fan. I really have. I shop at your stores weekly (often ... daily). I love that I can buy almost everything I need (minus a few grocery items) from your stores…and don’t necessarily have to go anywhere else. Convenience is important to mommies.

But you have pissed me off. I know you’re big….and probably feel invincible…but guess what – you can’t go pissing off your target (no pun intended) demographic and get away with it. And you just did it.

I’m a stay-at-home mom of two. I buy diapers at your stores, formula, clothing, and pretty much everything else you sell. Heck – I just ordered a microwave for my basement kitchen from your online store.

But that was then. And this is now.

You may feel like you’re not going to alienate a big group of your shoppers…but really – when you are anti-gay…it’s not just gay people that you’re alienating. You’re alienating anyone that believes in fairness, equality, love, equal rights, etc etc etc etc throughout the country, world….and more importantly…throughout your shopping audience. And whether or not some of your executives are homophobic, uber-weird religious (although I still don’t think religion should be used as an excuse to spread hate…but that’s my non-religious view) or whatever your problem is … I at least thought your PR department was smarter than this. is my new opinion: Screw you and your convenient shopping. I’ll happily drive around and shop at multiple places. I already phased out Wal-mart after (I don’t have enough room on the entire world wide web to list the reasons I stopped shopping at walmart)….very easily. In fact, it wasn’t even “phasing out”…I just stopping going there all-together (and haven’t stepped foot in one in years…heck, almost 10 years).

Now, if you fix this ... I will reconsider this decision.

Afterall, "At Target, diversity is much more than a goal or campaign. It’s a core value we integrate into every area of our business — from our suppliers, to our teams, to the shopping experience in our stores. We foster an inclusive culture that allows our high-performing and diverse team to drive innovation. " Right Gregg?

Monday, August 16, 2010


I realize that I have been posting way more pictures of Carter since this 30-day challenge started. That's not because I don't cram my camera into Avery's face as much as I do's just because she's stuck in her car seat/stroller in every outing.
BUT - I do have a ton of pictures of Avery from the past few here are just a few (for your viewing pleasure - I will post more later):

Friday, August 13, 2010


In my on-and-off attempt to continue the 30-day challenge, I brought the kids to an indoor (padded) play area in Medina (just south of Cleveland) yesterday called Amazone. It costs just under $5 (per child ... only kids playing on the equipment count - so I didn't pay for Avery) and was very stroller friendly.
One nice aspect was that one half was a jungle play area and the other half was an arcade. So if you do have older children (that are too cool for the play area) they can always blow people up on arcade games (always a crowd fav).
The entire play area was set up like a jungle...but sort of in this wipe-out (if you have never seen that show - you're missing out on some good ole' laugh-at-other-people-falling entertainment) meets playground sorta way. And for the most part, toddlers could get around on their own throughout the entire jungle (although my girlfriend (that I went with) and I had to enter into the jungle multiple times when a foot got stuck, someone got scared or there was a 'learning opportunity' about not-pushing, not-hitting, and not cutting in line).
Avery and her buddy Brock even seemed to enjoy the lights and noise (very stimulating for little ones - if only it had made her sleep through the night...sigh).

A few down-sides (but don't let this deter you from was honestly a very good time - the plus' very much out-number the minus'):

1.) When the jungle gets busy...there is a little bit of a cluster F for little ones. So if your kids are younger than 3 - pick your time wisely. Also, if you're bringing a baby in a stroller along with your toddler - make sure someone can watch your baby in the event that you have to chase your toddler in the jungle.

2.) There is a system in place (with wrist bands) to make sure nobody can snatch up your kid and walk out the door with them...and they are suppose to check bands prior to anyone leaving with a child. This didn't happen, in fact there was nobody near the door. So, watch your kids. But honestly, the fact that they even have a system is great - we should all be aware and watch our kids at all times in public areas.
For more information on Amazone - go to:

We more than likely won't be doing any super fun activities today. Today is a big day for our house (potentially) getting done. We have more contractors in and out today than any other day thus far, we're having furniture delivered, carpet installed, more tile work done, cabinets installed, etc.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Dave and Vanessa (and Dave's Birthday trip)

You may have noticed that I talk about a couple named Dave and Vanessa a lot. Nuff said…good post.


I met Dave and Vanessa years and years ago when I started dating Chad and had always wondered how they (meaning Chad - meeting Dave and Vanessa...not how Dave and Vanessa met....I shouldn't drink and post ... I just make no sense what-so-ever) had met and become such great friends (I ask a lot of has to be annoying to Chad - and pretty much everyone around me. When I say I ask a lot of questions... I literally ask questions about EVERYTHING. I'll get my kharma when Carter starts to ask "Why, but why, well why").

According to Chad, here’s how: a bunch of his high school buddies would hang out at Dave and Vanessa’s house almost weekly. They would watch tv, hang out, do who knows what (if I remember correctly…a lot of hanging out in high school mainly consisted of standing around acting cool – so maybe that went on too). He also mentioned something about watching "T&A" shows ... and I am going to go ahead and NOT ask questions about what that stands for...and assume they're pervs.

Well, I guess Chad and Dave would talk and just hang out ... and they became friends…and it sort of evolved into a really interesting mixture of friend meets father-son relationship. And since Chad’s dad had passed away – it was nice for him to have this relationship. In fact, it was nice for me too…since Dave always seemed to set him straight when he got out of control (thanks Dave – I still owe ya for that!).

I recall Chad calling me after we had been in huge fights (when we were dating…we’re perfect angels now…) and apologizing (which was HUGE) because he had talked to Dave…and Dave had talked him into his senses about something that he (read: both of us) were over reacting to. But…being that Chad and I are both uber stubborn aholes…we sort of needed someone to talk sense into one of us.

By the time Chad and I were going to get married – their friendship had really evolved into something very special - all of ours had. We all hung out, talked, we all drank together (you can thank me later for not posting pictures of some of those outings D&V).

To the extent that Chad asked Dave to be his father-figure for the wedding (I have to point out that when Chad asked Dave - we all cried like babies … sorry guys …had to do it … it’s cute).

I was going to post a super cute picture of the two of them before the wedding - but the bad ass...ness of this picture is not to be messed with. Gotta love how soprano-esque it is.

The reason I am bringing this all up is because Dave just celebrated his 40th birthday (ok…it wasn’t his 40th…but he looks 40…so we’re going with that). And we traveled to Canada (when uncle Trad watched the kids) to celebrate with him and Vanessa and some of their friends.

Oh yea - we're in a red, heart-shaped tub in this picture....drinkin' miller lite. Don't judge us...did you see the soprano-esque picture?

We actually went to Canada last year (and the year before) as well (below are a few pictures from last years trip) ...maybe it will become a ritual (hint hint wink wink)? Sorry Dave - but how could I not post this again?

It was a great time and we wish Dave a wonderful wonderful birthday (although belated – as this post should have been posted weeks ago). And if they’re reading this (you better be!) I want you both to know that you are truly very special to us and we love you both.

(and you thought I would write something funny or sarcastic … I’m just a bag-a-surprises huh?)