Monday, February 15, 2010

Happy Presidents Day

Disclaimer: This post is a bitter one. Read at your own risk.

Yup - my poorly constructed graphic for presidents day. Give me some slack...Carter is destroying the house as I make this.

As it is another strange holiday (that only government and bank employees get off work) I have decided to post a happy day-off “Government and Bank jerks day” post (Chris, you’re obviously excluded…I know you work- you’ll see why I said “government employees” when you read the rest of this post).

Why ... why do you seem to aggravated with the government today Chrissy – you ask. Well, outside of a lot of other reasons…taxes. Today’s gripe…taxes. We are having a lot of tax arguments (us-vs-government and us-vs-accountant) these days.

There are a few reasons for this…but here is my favorite from this week:

The government has readjusted our last year’s income (how do they do that you ask…especially when your employer sends you a form with an exact number). I guess - because they can. They give no excuses or proof…outside of… “it’s just this amount now.” AND – because it’s late (now) we owe interest. And if you find this ridiculous…you just wait – it gets even better.

- We just received this notice (this month - February of 2010). And the notice states that our payments were due in November of 2009. Hmm…how is this possible you ask. Well, because they had our old address. Strange…you say – since we have updated our address (multiple times)…with…wait for it…wait for it….THE GOVERNMENT (and the post office…another government-run entity, along with many other establishments who also failed to record our address change – also lookin’ at you here Chase Bank).
- So the post mark on the envelope was originally October 2009. And then, when the post office caught the address change issue – they “put it aside.” The next postmark on the envelope is February 2010. So, if you can tell me what happened to this “important tax information enclosed” envelope for four whole months….you win. You win the “What the Fuck does the government do with their time and our money” prize.

I mean….what happens to an envelope for 4 months in one post office location? Let’s take a poll. Do you think they:

A.) See how many envelopes they can pile in one spot before the pile reaches the ceiling
B.) Build envelope houses out of important –looking envelopes (the more important – the higher on the house they go)
C.) Employee Santa’s elves to handle returned (wrong address) envelopes…therefore explaining the October through January lack of action

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